Forever Awkward, But Always Amused

Yesterday I had an awkward/amusing exchange.

I was coming back up from a quick trip to the apartment basement (reserved solely for overdue laundry runs and trash drop-off). I was distracted by my phone and didn’t notice the elevator stop at the main floor. (You HAVE to use the elevator to get to the basement, otherwise I’d take the stairs.)

The door binged, I placed my iPhone in my pocket, and swung the door open. I quickly realized it was not my floor. What alerted me to this was not my superior observant capabilities (because, let’s be real, they should have kicked in MUCH sooner) but because of the baby sitting in the stroller in the lobby.

I stopped. The baby looked up at me. I looked back. Then I looked right. Then looked back. The baby was still staring at me, a sort of vacant, but also “what are you doing with your life?” expression. (Side note, how can a face be both vacant AND make you question your life in .223 seconds? This baby, man.)

Unfortunately, I had also partially stepped out of the elevator and was now unsure how to proceed.

Several thoughts ran through my head:

  • Why hadn’t I noticed this wasn’t my floor?
  • Why was that baby right in front of the elevator door, consequently blocking the only exit?
  • Where was the baby’s keeper?
  • Who leaves a baby in the lobby??
  • And in the way of an OUTWARD swinging door?
  • How did they know the exact distance from the stroller to the swinging door?
  • Should I wait for the parent to come back?
  • Isn’t there some sort of protocol for holding the elevator in this type of situation, like a Baby In Lobby Pending Parental Pick Up Clause?
  • But really, where was the parent?!??

I did what any normal person would do. I gave the baby a slightly apologetic look while quickly backing into the elevator, desperately pushing the “door close” button, hoping no one was watching. I definitely did not panic and kept my cool in this potentially awkward situation.

#CrisisAverted

Slanted Reality

Slanted reality - looking at the world from another direction.

Slanted reality – looking at the world from another direction.

I’m sorry I’ve been gone so long. Here’s a picture I took the other day. I’ve been wanting to try out some of these experimental puddle/reflection/abstract pictures and so yesterday when it rained, I seized my chance. I know I looked weird crouching on the pavement, moving my iPhone one way and then another, but I wanted the perfect angle. A couple of cars drove by, and I wished they’d slow down so I could cheerfully wave my hand and tell them I was in fact, not insane, just a photographer. Still, I like how the photo turned out.

Note to my future self

Aside

Note to future self: Just because it’s sunny outside and yesterday was warm does not mean you should automatically forgo the tights and jacket option. Check the weather like a normal person.

What I’ve been doing all these past weeks…instead of blogging.

To say I’ve been waylaid by life as the sole means for my lack of posts would be cheesy and cliche. That’s why I’m switching around the wording.

Of late, I have been rather busy with the holidays and such, so I must apologize for my lack of posting.

Doesn’t that sound posh.

Okay, but really…I have been busy. As long as you count sleeping in and reading books busy. (Which I do.) But I figured since it’s the New Year and all – I should do the obligatory New Year’s Resolutions post where I try to shame myself into being better at things.

  1. I resolve to write more frequently on my blog[s].
  2. I resolve to exercise more.
  3. I resolve to make better eating choices.
  4. I resolve to read a gazillon books.
  5. I resolve get an internship in NYC this summer.
  6. I resolve to write a novel.
  7. I resolve to buy less shoes…even if they are on super sale.
  8. I resolve to travel and take photographs.
  9. I resolve to be more disciplined in my writing.
  10. I resolve to actually check back on my New Year’s Resolutions sooner than January 2014.

That last one may be a bit of a stretch. It’s embarrassing to say, but sometimes I forget entirely about my resolutions as soon as I’ve posted them some place. It’s like my brain says, “Whew, glad you got that out of your system, let’s go back to that sleeping in business.”

And then for summary: I had a great winter break, thank you for asking. I saw friends + family and it was a nice bit of relaxation. I saw THE HOBBIT and rather enjoyed it. I bought myself a Nikon D3100 and am so far in love it’s not even the least bit funny. I successfully completed NaNoWriMo in November and now have a very lackluster novel to revitalize (it just needs some tender love and care…then it’ll be a decent novel.) and I’ve also taken quite a bit of photography with that new camera. Now I’m ready to get back into the swing of things as school starts next week.

Cheerio!

A Conversation With a Three-Year-Old

“What’s this? It looks like a chocolate sprinkle, is it a sprinkle?” He said.

I extended my hand and he dropped the small black speck into my outstretched palm. I had to peer down close and determine the strange substance. What would a chocolate sprinkle be doing in a gym?

“No, sorry, it’s not a sprinkle. It’s just a piece of black plastic,” I said.

“Oh,” He said. He took the speck back and held it in his hand for a moment more, scrunching up his face and pondering.

“So does that mean we shouldn’t eat it?” He finally asked.

Laughing: “No, definitely don’t eat it,” I said.

What happens when I’m supposed to be writing…

I have a screenplay I’m working on. A screenplay with a pressing deadline and oh, 40 or more pages still needing to be written. So, naturally, I’m making fried chicken.

AKA ALL the fried chicken in the world

A girl has to eat, right?

Here’s my brain’s rationalization.

“Laura, you’ve been working so hard. You should take a break.”

“But I still have so much work to do!”

“How about a compromise?”

“I’m listening…”

“You want to keep working for as long as possible without taking a break, right?”

“Right”

“So no breaks – except for lunch, which doesn’t count because you have to eat…you know, to keep up your energy while writing.”

“Of course.”

“So why don’t you just take a few moments for yourself and MAKE ALL THE FRIED CHICKEN IN THE WORLD.”

“Yes!!”

So that’s what I did. And it took way longer than just a few moments.

 

Why I don’t ask my father for photography titles…

I was staring at one of my photographs, trying to think of the perfect title when my father walked into the room. I asked him what he would title the tree with green leaves and lichen on the bark. He contemplated for a moment and then said. “Jabba the Hutt Emerging!”